Thursday 6 October 2011

My 5, no, 6 top tips for empowering yourself

My husband says that I think too much. And maybe he's right, but last week I was asked to present at a company training about how I'd built my business. I though about it and realised that I'd mainly just been myself. That's not very helpful is it? So, I started to think about what being myself meant and how I went about that.

When life is working really well, everything is flowing, I am happy and have a sense of achievement, I feel empowered. I feel that anything is possible, absolutely anything. So I asked myself why is that? What happens, or what do I do that leads to that feeling? And I came up with the following top 5 tips. Then I though of another one so I added that too.

  1. Be honest & ethical – now everyone may have different ideas of what this means but I try to treat others how I would like to be treated. I also have to voice my opinion or thoughts if I feel that not doing so would make me feel, or appear to be, dishonest. Basically I have to be able to sleep at night and not feel as though I've done someone a disservice, or that someone has taken advantage of me. It cuts both ways.

  2. Look out for opportunities for others, put people together where you see or feel there is a connection or some synergy in what they do, or how they think. Network for others and they will network for you.

  3. Credit where credit's due – whether its a pat on the back, an acknowledgement of a job well done, a thank you or telling someone how much they've improved, or how good they are at something, don't keep it to yourself (or just tell you friends and family about it). That's nice but even better is to tell the person concerned. All too often people only get feedback when they've done something wrong. Even the little things count and a thank you goes a long way.

  4. Accept praise – When someone does tell you how great you are at something, don't deny it. Even if it wasn't up to your standards, they felt it was great enough to tell you. Don't dismiss their feelings on the subject. If you don't know what to say, just say 'thanks'. The first few times you do this you will feel strange and uncomfortable, but you'll get used to it. It does boost your confidence and it validates the other person too. So it's a win -win scenario.

  5. Don't try to be someone else, but do aim to be the best version of you that you can possibly be.

Oh, and the 6th one? Leading on from number 4, it's absolutely okay to say that you're good at something! Yes, it is! We are too quick to accept our own failings and shortcomings and nowhere near quick enough to accept the things that we are good at. And we're all good at something. Don't be arrogant about it, accept it and know it. And if asked, let it be known that actually you're good at that thing.

I wish I'd known, accepted and put these in to practice a long time ago. I may have done it unconsciously but as I've learnt them consciously throughout my life they have had a massive impact. I hope that maybe you can take something from them and feel empowered too. And maybe even help to empower others.

This post was adapted at too-early o'clock this morning from a presentation I did last Sunday.

1 comment:

Bluestocking Mum said...

Splendid post Helen. Lots struck a chord, especially the bit about thinking too much.

I'm a chronic overthinker and deadful ruminator. lol.
Debs
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